Get A Grip On Clutter

I’ve copied this article only to keep it on hand, and to remind myself that my home is to be a retreat not a case for clutter: 

 

How to De-Clutter Your Home—for Good

By Julie Morgenstern
Expert Content  |  September 26, 2011

Read more: http://www.oprah.com/home/Discover-Your-Clutter-Problem/2#ixzz1sk2faPBI

Convinced your clutter is the result of your own sloppiness, laziness, or incompetence? Not true! Thinking that way inaccurately puts the blame and shame on you—and prevents you from finding the right solution. In my years as a professional organizer, I've learned that most people desperately want to get organized, but are held back by hidden obstacles they don't understand. Clutter is actually caused on three different levels.

Level 1: Technical Problems

All messes can be attributed to at least one technical problem. Technical problems are simple mistakes in your organizing system that can be as easy to fix as changing a light bulb. Identify your problem area, and try one of these solutions to get started.

Items Have No Home

Simply put, you can't put things away if there's no place to put them. If items are piles all over the place, it is likely that you never designated a particular spot for them. In other words, the item has no "home."

Solution: Take the time to assign each item a single, consistent home, e.g. hats always go in this basket; scissors always go in this drawer. Label everything so you'll always remember where it belongs and easily find it when you need it.

More Stuff Than Space

If your closets, drawers, cabinets and shelves are all packed full—and you still have lots of surface piles—you've got more stuff than storage space.

Solution: You've got two options: (1) Lighten your load, or (2) Add more storage space. Make sure you're using the space you do have as efficiently as possible. Find hidden pockets of storage between cabinet shelves spaced too far apart, under the hanging clothes in your closet, on the insides of closet doors. Maximize vertical wall space and look for dual function furniture (end tables, coffee tables and ottomans) items that feature storage.

Storage Is Inconvenient

Is it too much of an ordeal to put things away? If you have to go climb a ladder, move a piece of furniture out of the way, or cross the length of your house just to put something away—you'll never do it.
Solution: Store things where you use them to make them easily accessible. For example, if you do your bills in the kitchen, store your financial files and calculator there, not in the spare bedroom upstairs. Look for where your piles are and create storage there.

Organizing Is Boring

Lets' face it—organizing and putting things away everyday is a dull, repetitive chore.
Solution: Make it more appealing and fun by adding a sense of personal style. Get containers you love instead of withering baskets, broken-filing cabinets and leftover moving boxes. Don't underestimate the power of pizzazz—it can make a big difference in whether you feel inspired to use and maintain your organizing system.

Level 2: External Realities

These are environmental forces that limit how organized you can be. Recognizing them empowers you to address the true source of the problem, and stop feeling like there's something wrong with you. Identify the source(s) of your disorganization and use the solutions below to put them into perspective.

The "Other" Person
There's nothing more frustrating than having your organizing efforts undermined or disregarded by someone you live or work with.

Solution: Whether it's your spouse, child, roommate, co-worker, or employer, appeal to their own priorities by finding out what the clutter is costing them—your spouse may hate being late for work everyday, your child may be frustrated by losing game pieces, your boss may be embarrassed in front of visiting clients. Design systems together so you both have ownership—and they'll be more motivated to put things away.

An Unrealistic Workload

Running a home, taking care of kids, helping your aging parents, and holding down a job are huge responsibilities. If you're trying jam 20 hours worth of tasks into a 10-hour day, it's going to be nearly impossible to stay organized. Who has time to clean up?
Solution: Track yourself for a week, noting everything you get done, as well as what you don't. Then take a hard look to see what tasks on your list are superfluous. If everything must get done, get help. Consider delegating tasks to other family members, or hiring an outside service.

Speed of Life/Technology

Technology has sped up the pace of life, allowing us to work faster, learn more, do more, and be reachable 24 hours a day. It's easy to get caught up in the frenzy of pursuing every opportunity, but perpetual motion will burn you out.
Solution: Apply the brakes from time to time, and be willing to say "no" occasionally. Just because emails and calls arrive instantaneously, doesn't mean you need to answer them immediately. Don't be afraid to turn off the ringer on your phone, or the message alert on your email, and slow down to keep your life in order and calm.

During Transitions and Life Changes

Each time we go through a major life change (getting married or divorced, moving, having a family, switching careers, starting a new business, going back to school,) we experience a breakdown of our organizational systems. It's inevitable—we are dealing with a new set of realities—and it takes time to process the information and to actually see what there is to organize.
Solution: Wait for things to settle a bit, so you have a clearer idea of your new priorities and needs, before setting up any new organizing systems.

Limited Space

Living or working in a tiny home or office with little storage space will challenge even the most organized person. If you are already down to just the essentials—and have utilized every square inch of space—you may have simply run out of room. Trying to store more things than is physically possible will only increase your frustration.

Solution: If the needs of your (growing) family or (changing) job have increased, it may be time to look for a bigger space. Until that's possible, use an off-site storage facility to hold off-season items, memorabilia, and other items you don't need to access daily.

Level 3: Psychological Obstacles

Hidden internal forces may be pulling you towards disorganization—no matter how much you crave control! You may be subconsciously sabotaging your organizing systems and holding yourself back. If you see yourself in the categories below, try one of the solutions to get started.

Need for Abundance

Did you grow up with scarce resources and feel like you never had "enough" (money, clothes, food, attention, or love)? If so, possessing large quantities of stuff now, as an adult, is probably comforting. It gives you a sense of fullness, comfort, and security while the idea of a spare, clutter-free environment makes you feel anxious and empty.

Solution: Instead of fighting your personality and forcing yourself to throw things out—try celebrating the abundance by organizing everything you own. Once everything is accessible and orderly, it may be easier for you to see what's truly excess and part with items bit by bit. No matter what you'll have the chance to enjoy your belongings, instead of feeling lost under them.

Sentimental Attachment

Do you get so emotionally attached to objects, it's hard to get rid of anything—even if you don't use it anymore? When items symbolize a part of ourselves, a time in our lives, or people we knew, it can be tough to let go. Saving some items is fine, but if you save everything—you won't be able to enjoy any of it.
Solution: Limit how much you keep for sentimental reasons and hold on to only the most important 20 percent in each category: kid's artwork, old clothes, etc. Make letting go of the rest easier by giving it away to a friend or charity. Remember, you can still own all of the memories of your past without holding onto every physical reminder of it.

Conquistador of Chaos

Some people keep their lives or spaces disorganized because they love the thrill of coming to their own rescue and seeing their way through almost impossible situations. Often, people like this grew up under challenging circumstances and more so than anyone know how to handle a crisis. Actually capable of setting up wonderful organizing systems, they are always dismantling them and starting over-in search of an even better solution.
Solution: Instead of constantly rebuilding your organizing systems, direct your talents to a new challenge. Learn a language. Become a better parent. Get involved in your community. Put those expert-problem solving talents to better use than living in constant chaos!

Thriving On Distraction

Clutter can serve as a wonderful and convenient distraction from life's more complex challenges. In other words, as long as you have a closet to clean or a stack of papers to sort, you can avoid thinking about more perplexing problems.
Solution: If you are using clutter to distract yourself from bigger problems, search for a more direct way of coping with major stress. Reach out to a friend or professional who can help you sort out the real issues you're avoiding, and then you'll begin to enjoy your orderly home again.

Need for Retreat

If your disorganization gets so extreme that you won't let anyone into your home or office, or if you frequently turn down social invitations to spend all your time "organizing" and "re-organizing" your stuff, consider whether you are using clutter as a protective shield—a way of insulating yourself from the outside world. It can be okay to want some private space, but living in that chaos may increase your anxiety level.

Solution: Don't organize your whole space all at once. Go slowly. Start by creating one clutter-free room in which you keep nothing but items you use and love. If the experience feels good, create another room like that, then another. Remember, an organized work or living space is a much nicer "retreat" than a cluttered one.

A Senior Moment

This is too cute not to share…

Several days ago as I left a meeting at my church, I desperately gave myself a personal TSA pat down. I was looking for my keys. They were not in my pockets. A quick search in the meeting room revealed nothing.

Suddenly I realized, I must have left them in the car. Frantically, I headed for the parking lot. My wife, Diane, has scolded me many times for leaving the keys in the ignition. My theory is the ignition is the best place not to lose them. Her theory is that the car will be stolen. As I burst through the doors of the church, I came to a terrifying conclusion. Her theory was right. The parking lot was empty.

I immediately call the police. I gave them my location, confessed that I had left my keys in the car, and that it had been stolen. Then I made the most difficult call of all, “Honey,” I stammered. I always call her “honey” in times like these. “I left my keys in the car, and it has been stolen.”

There was a period of silence. I thought the call had been dropped, but then I heard Diane’s voice. “Ken” she barked, “I dropped you off!” Now it was my time to be silent. Embarrassed, I said, “Well, come and get me.” Diane retorted, “I will, as soon as I convince this policeman I have not stolen your car?”

How to Stay Young

 

Throw out nonessential numbers.  

This includes age, weight and height.
Let the doctors worry about them.  

That is why you pay them.

Keep only cheerful friends.
The grouches pull you down.  

(keep this In mind if you are one of those grouches)

Keep learning:
Learn more about the computer,

crafts, gardening, whatever.

Never let the brain get idle.
"An idle mind is the devil's workshop."
And the devil's name is Alzheimer's!

Enjoy the simple things.

Laugh often, long and loud.

Laugh until you gasp for breath.
And if you have a friend who makes you laugh,  

spend lots and  Lots of time with HIM/HER.  

 

 

The tears happen:
Endure, grieve, and move on.  

The only person who is with us our entire life,  

is ourselves.  LIVE while you are alive.

Surround yourself with what you love:
Whether it's family, pets, keepsakes,

music, plants, hobbies, whatever.

Your home is your refuge.

Cherish your health:
If it is good, preserve it.
If it is unstable, improve it.
If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.



Don't take guilt trips.
Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county,   

to a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is.

Tell the people you love that you love them,

at every opportunity.

 

 

Purple Hat Angel

IF I HAD MY LIFE TO LIVE OVER

by Erma Bombeck (not verified)

I would have gone to bed when I was sick instead of pretending the earth would go into a holding pattern if I weren't there for the day.

I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage.

I would have talked less and listened more.

I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained, or the sofa faded.

I would have eaten the popcorn in the 'good' living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace.

I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather ramble about his youth.

I would have shared more of the responsibility carried by my husband.

I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day because my hair had just been teased and sprayed.

I would have sat on the lawn with my grass stains.

I would have cried and laughed less while watching television and more while watching life.

I would never have bought anything just because it was practical, wouldn't show soil, or was guaranteed to last a lifetime.

Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I'd have cherished every moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.
 
When my kids kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, "Later. Now go get washed up for dinner."

There would have been more "I love you's." More "I'm sorry's."

But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute...look at it and really see it live it and never give it back.

Stop sweating the small stuff.

Don't worry about who doesn't like you, who has more, or who's doing what.

Instead, let's cherish the relationships we have with those who do love us.

Not For Sissies…One Liners

SO MANY MEN, SO FEW WHO CAN AFFORD ME.

GOD MADE US SISTERS, PROZAC MADE US FRIENDS.

IF THEY DON’T HAVE CHOCOLATE IN HEAVEN, I AIN’T GOING.

MY MOTHER IS A TRAVEL AGENT FOR GUILT TRIPS.

PRINCESS, HAVING HAD SUFFICIENT EXPERIENCE WITH PRINCES, SEEKS FROG.

COFFEE, CHOCOLATE, MEN … SOME THINGS ARE JUST BETTER RICH.

DON’T TREAT ME ANY DIFFERENTLY THAN YOU WOULD THE QUEEN.

IF YOU WANT BREAKFAST IN BED, SLEEP IN THE KITCHEN.

DINNER IS READY WHEN THE SMOKE ALARM GOES OFF.

I’M OUT OF ESTROGEN – AND I HAVE A GUN.

GUYS HAVE FEELINGS TOO. BUT LIKE…WHO CARES?

NEXT MOOD SWING: 6 MINUTES.

AND YOUR POINT IS?

WARNING: I HAVE AN ATTITUDE AND I KNOW HOW TO USE IT.

OF COURSE I DON’T LOOK BUSY…I DID IT RIGHT THE FIRST TIME.

SO NOT START WITH ME. YOU WILL NOT WIN.

YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT, SO PLEASE SHUT UP.

ALL STRESSED OUT AND NO ONE TO CHOKE.

I’M ONE OF THOSE BAD THINGS THAT HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE.

HOW CAN I MISS YOU IF YOU WON’T GO AWAY?

SORRY IF I LOOKED INTERESTE. I’M NOT.

IF WE ARE WHAT WE EAT, I’M FAST, CHEAP AND EASY.

 DON’T UPSET ME! I’M RUNNING OUT OF PLACES TO HIDE THE BODIES.

WHO LIT THE FUSE ON YOUR TAMPON?

I ONLY HAVE A KITCHEN CUZ IT CAME WITH THE HOUSE.

The U and S in Uville

Remembering one of the emails that made rounds after 9/11/01

Every U down in Uville liked U.S. a lot, but the Binch, who lived Far East of Uville, did not.

The Binch hated U.S! the whole U.S. way!
Now don't ask me why, for nobody can say.

It could be his turban was screwed on too tight,
or the sun from the desert had beaten too bright.

But I think that the most likely reason of all
may have been that his heart was two sizes too small.
 
But, whatever the reason, his heart or his turban,
he stood facing Uville, the part that was urban.

"They're doing their business," he snarled from his perch. "They're raising their families! They're going to church!

They're leading the world, and their empire is thriving, I MUST keep the S's and U's from surviving!"
 
Tomorrow, he knew, all the U's and the S's,
would put on their pants and their shirts and their dresses.

They'd go to their offices, playgrounds and schools, and abide by their U and S values and rules.
 
And then they'd do something he liked least of all,
every U down in U-ville, the tall and the small, would stand all united, each U and each S,
and they'd sing Uville's anthem, "God bless us! God bless!"

All around their Twin Towers of Uville, they'd stand, and their voices would drown every sound in the land.
 
"I must stop that singing," Binch said with a smirk, and he had an idea---an idea that might work!

The Binch stole some U airplanes in U morning hours, and crashed them right into the Uville Twin Towers.

"They'll wake to disaster!" he snickered, so sour,
"and how can they sing when they can't find a tower?"
 
The Binch cocked his ear as they woke from their sleeping, all set to enjoy their U-wailing and weeping.

Instead he heard something that started quite low, and it built up quite slow, but it started to grow.

And the Binch heard the most unpredictable thing...and he couldn't believe it---they started to sing!
 
He stared down at U-ville, not trusting his eyes,
what he saw was a shocking, disgusting surprise!

Every U down in U-ville, the tall and the small,
was singing without any towers at all!

He HADN'T stopped U-Ville from singing! It sung!
For down deep in the hearts of the old and the young.

Those Twin Towers were standing, called Hope and called Pride, and you can't smash the towers we hold deep inside.
 
So we circle the sites where our heroes did fall,
with a hand in each hand of the tall and the small.

And we mourn for our losses while knowing we'll cope, for we still have inside that U-Pride and U-Hope.
 
For America means a bit more than tall towers,
It means more than wealth or political powers.

It's more than our enemies ever could guess, so may God bless America! Bless us! God bless!

Pass Me The Ball

 
This  MORNING I SEARCHED MY WALLET. . . .
IT  WAS EMPTY.

THEN  I CHECKED MY POCKETS. . .
I  FOUND A FEW COINS.

THEN I  SEARCHED MY HEART. . . .
&  FOUND YOU

. . . I  Realized HOW RICH
I REALLY  AM!!!
 
 
 

LIFE ISN'T ABOUT WAITING FOR THE STORM TO PASS...
IT'S ABOUT LEARNING
TO DANCE IN THE RAIN!

Reason, Season, or a Lifetime Friend

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person.

When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support. To aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a God send and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire
fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn. They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it, it is real.. But only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

I want to thank all my friends for being a part of my life, whether you were a reason, a season or a lifetime. If our paths had not crossed, I' wouldn’t be the person I am today…

GUARDIAN ANGEL

Angels do exist, only sometimes they haven't got wings…we call them friends.

Husband & Wife Week

Husband and Wife Week --If your spouse is still your best friend, works extremely hard, has been with you through triumphs and tragedies, who loves you when you're at your worst, and whom you are PROUD to be married to, copy and paste this with the date you were married...♥ 8-19-1975 ♥ Going on 36 wonderful years!!!

Never regret love. No matter how blind, it improved your world view. No matter how foolish, it made you wiser. And no matter how generous, it made you more.
Hubba, hubba,
    The Universe

And while we're at it, never regret the second scoop - that one's always mine.

Notes from the Universe

Give with a truly glad heart for the sole purpose of the good it will do, and whatever you give shall return to you, multiplied, as if on wings, covered in sparkles.
Richly,
    The Universe

If I told you there have been no mistakes,
that I understand every decision you've ever made,
and that the challenges you've faced, you've faced
for everyone, would you listen?

If I told you that what you dream of, I dream of for you,
that the only things "meant to be" are what you decide
upon, and that all that stands between you and the life
of your dreams are the thoughts you choose
to think, would you try to understand?

And if I told you that you are never alone,
that there are angels who sing your name in praise,
and that I couldn't possibly be any more proud of you
than I already am, would you believe me?

Would you? Even if I pulled your leg, made you blush,
                  and winked between the lines?

Then I shall...

The Universe
(from the Foreword of Book 1)